I'll never forget the first time I surfed with Sam; and that's undoubtedly because he wasn't even there.
Living in Santa Cruz for the past 6 years, I've gone through phases with surfing. I can paddle out nearly everyday for weeks, then go months without surfing.
Well, on this particular morning, I made plans to meet some friends at second peak in Pleasure Point. At the time, I was consistently waking up every morning around 7, starting my day with some breathwork, a quick walk to Black's Beach and then by 8'ish, I'd be on my way to Pleasure Point.
How I get around town (for the most part) is on my ebike and I love starting my days biking from Black's Beach (where I live) over to Pleasure Point. Wearing my wetsuit, despite it still being a little wet from the day before, keeps me warm as my face is met with the chilly air and salt from the ocean mist along the coast.
So, there we are catching waves, on a crowded Wednesday morning in August. No fog, clear skies ... beautiful day and mellow waves; enjoyed from beginners to seasoned shredders.
After catching up with my friends (and a few waves), it happened ...
Being In The Moment.
First one dolphin. Then the next ... and yet another.
We were met with dolphins just feet away from the pack of surfers. Sure, if you get in the water enough, you'll definitely see seals diving, otters frolicking, and the majestic pelicans flying just inches above your head while balancing on your board.
But dolphins ... well, these gorgeous positive vibration friends of the sea ... That's a more rare sight than your everyday sighting of the more common ocean animals.
It was a special day indeed. These dolphins were hanging out with us. They weren't passing through, they were putting on a show. Literally, we were watching them leap in the air while the much smaller and (clearly babies) were testing their hang time.
It's the kind of morning dreams are made of.
What happened next is what truly blew my mind so my heart could crack wide open.
My friends had just paddled back to shore and there I was just relishing in the moment, the type of feeling that makes you feel at one (dare I say at peace) with Creation itself.
I was looking to my right at the horizon then slowly shifted my gaze to the left and I saw a long cherry red surfboard with a silvery white hair flow that felt familiar.
As this surfer passed, I remember bringing a red surfboard to my family's funeral of Sam Anagnostou. I was told it was his board and I brought it to the funeral and back to the Anagnostou Capitola house, which is why I recognized this cherry red board so clearly.
Next, that silvery white hair, you know that kind of Beatles look ... Well, that struck me to my core.
In that moment, I thought I wanted to see this person's face and I could have paddled to get into a better position to see his face. But something told me not to; that rather the mystery in itself was what was making the experience so special. I'm not a fool, and I know that had I paddled to see his face I would have been met with disappointment to see indeed it was not Sam.
And it was in that moment that all I could do was smile and bring a slight chuckle to my being.
Trusting Your Intuition.
We seek so much for answers. We look outside of ourselves because we discount our own innate intelligence. In a moment, when we actually tap into our intuition, we gaslight ourselves ... and for what?
Caught in our minds, always thinking and in the process disregarding our feelings.
What does it even mean to feel anyway?
For years, I was disconnected from my body and I didn't even know it. I'd make decisions based on how I felt, yet anytime an uncomfortable feeling would come up; well unknowingly I'd shove it down.
That shoving down looked like numbing with food and distracting myself from feeling uncomfortable and often "negative" feelings by focusing on my work. Yet that only worked for so long.
Mind-Body Connection.
Mental Health is a tricky subject, although I've been a mental health advocate for the better portion of my life; I've come to realize that prioritizing mental health alone is only half the picture.
Don't get me wrong, I'm deeply encouraged by the rise of prioritizing mental health. But, why is it that no one seems to talk about emotional health?
Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor revolutionized the TED brand; in fact so much so that the TED organization attributes much of their success from her viral TED Talk all the way back in 2008.
As a neuroanatomist, she actually brought a brain with the spinal cord attached, onto the well recognized red circle carpet. Most people remember her for that, or maybe for being named to Times Most Influential people that year. I remember her for introducing the 90 Second Rule.
Dr. Jill explained almost 20 years ago on that stage the true mind-body connection and this is how it works ...
Anytime you experience a thought, that thought sends a signal to the body, and that signal manifests itself as a feeling.
If you allow yourself to feel that feeling, then it will move through your body in less than 90 seconds ("the 90 second rule").
Yet, if you unknowingly distract/avoid/numb yourself from feeling that uncomfortable feeling you get stuck in your mind with repetitive thoughts.
The Rise Of Emotional Fitness.
I believe that mainstream society prioritizes mental health for all the wrong reasons. Firstly, let's think of thoughts as the language of the mind. Whereas feelings are the language of the body.
With this in mind, along with the 90 second rule, it actually makes sense why we prioritize mental health and there's little to no discussion around emotional health.
Think about it ... We're a culture disconnected from our body (feeling our feelings and being vulnerable to express them with ourselves and others). And it's for that very reason, we focus on the mind... because we aren't allowing ourselves to feel, we ruminate and get stuck in recycled negative thoughts.
So much so that research from Harvard reveals that we have over 60,000 thoughts a day, with 80% being from the day before and 90% of those thoughts being negative.
Are you beginning to see why the collective "we" focuses on our thoughts (mental health)?
It does make sense why we prioritize mental health because on the surface that's what we see ... we're stuck in our heads.
The surprising truth however, uncovers that when we prioritize what I like to call emotional fitness, well then that's actually how we clear our mind.
You cannot clear your mind from thinking differently, you have to feel differently to clear your thoughts ... and that's precisely where breathwork comes into play.
The Power Of Your Breath.
As a breathwork practitioner, I've led literally thousands of people through various breathwork techniques ranging from a "rebirthing" trauma release style of breathwork to more practical every day techniques that quickly get you into rest and digest.
My intention in sharing this transformative modality is to give you a glimpse into the power of your breath.
One of my favorite techniques is backed by Stanford's Lab as the number one way to quickly go from stress, anxiety and overthinking into calm and clarity. This technique is called the Cyclic Sigh and the best part about it is that it's simple as can be and just takes a few minutes.
Here's what you do
- Through your nose, inhale all the way up as you let your belly expand
- When you get to the top of your breath, through your nose, "sip" in a bit more air
- Let it all out with an audible sigh as you drop your shoulders and bring your belly back in.
That's it, super simple, right!
Do this for a few minutes, or even just 60 seconds and you'll quickly notice how settling it is. As I mentioned, this is just a very basic breathwork technique, there are many others; I'll be sharing through this blog series, but for now ...
Can you commit to doing 2 minutes of the Cyclic Sigh before you put your head to your pillow tonight?
I love learning and I'm sure you do as well, and if you are truly committed to helping yourself to help others; please do something with this learning and take action to integrate it into your daily routine.
I'll Always Remember.
When I think back to that moment I "surfed with Sam", I still find myself smiling with a slight chuckle.
The human experience is vast beyond what our minds can comprehend.
We can dance with the meaning of life, what happens after death and yet at the end of the day; what I believe matters most are the these small moments in our life with deep stillness where the mind begins to settle, the intrusive thoughts fade away, and we reconnect with the magic and miracle that is life on this planet.
All the while letting go of the pressure from the outer world, the "should's" of the mind, and making our way from doing to being so we can truly feel peace; moment by moment.
To remembering,
Sam
No AI was used in the writing of this blog, just 100% human expression.